Well, we've definitely entered a new phase. There's more obstinate behavior from our little boy, but there's also a lot more fun. As his personality becomes more clear, his sweetness is reaffirmed in my eyes. He treats Cecily with real tender care and will tell me "uh-oh baby" when she cries. Just last evening John was able to help me with our bedtime routine. As we all ended up in the nursery sitting in the most relaxed of positions I held Cecily and Oliver laid his head on my lap. After John had finished reading from the scriptures he notified Oliver that it was time to get his milk from the kitchen in preparation for bedtime. Oliver jumped up in anticipation of hot milk and did a most professional jig and swooped suavely out of the room and onto the kitchen. John and I looked at one another in surprise, eyes wide open. Now if only I could get him to repeat it.
It was such a simple evening but I couldn't have been happier. I have recently attempted paying conscious attention to my feelings so that I may more fully be conscientious of my actions. I've been able to recognize where I allow unnecessary stress to overcome me and I've also been able to recognize when something is good and to allow myself to enjoy it. And oddly enough, I found how much I truly enjoy being domesticated and being a Mother. I was so happy to find this out as I never thought much of Motherhood as a child or young adult. I knew I would attempt it at one point in life if allowed the opportunity. But I also felt trepidation at the prospect once it became a possibility, only because I didn't and couldn't really know if I would care for it until it actually happened. I've always been of the opinion that many things and circumstances can be made good dependent upon one's attitude, all within reason of course. And I held the belief that motherhood was of eternal importance, and so I took the task upon myself. And I'm so glad that I have done so. As all the mommy blogs and devoted posts on fb to moms will tell you, it isn't easy. There were moments this week when I realized that I was slowly loosing my mind. I told John that I had lost a few marbles and cried and wanted to desperately for someone to just give me an hour alone to myself. But I realized that the more I thought I would loose my mind the less I was capable of handling the situation and the less I accomplished. Mind over matter has been difficult these days, but boy does it make all the difference.
Oliver has started the most adorable thing. He has mimicked John in the past by exclaiming excitement over new things with a down-up-down inflection of his voice while loudly saying "whhooooaaaa". However it has evolved, as of today to where he will stop still, widen his eyes and lock his focus on you and whisper ever so slightly and slowly, "wow". It really does get me every time. And he doesn't over use it, meaning I know he's actually excited about whatever it is that he's saying "wow" over. I love that the most simple things make him happy.
Oliver's language has truly taken off. Saying several new words each day and now speaking new words without enticement. He of course has much to learn, but we were once again so happy to hear improvement from him.
Cecily is now sitting comfortably and reaching for items while sitting. She's very aware of the people around her and is always looking to be where all the action is. I find it fascinating to watch her and Oliver communicate in the most simple and basic of ways. The interact, play, and show affection for one another and like I said before, I'm truly amazed at how easy it is and how little is required to show love for one another.
Cecily loves to laugh and is so full of smiles. She's recently taken a liking to John (finally!) and will follow him around the room and smile until she can attract his attention. It's fascinating to see how important his attention is to her. I feel that I have so much to learn from both Oliver and Cecily and hope that I can take the time to calm my mind and feelings enough to see what it is that is there.
Well, if this post ended up somewhat convoluted I'll readily attribute it to the muddy feeling in my brain and hope that what I've written will be enough of a reminder of how I've felt and what we've experienced at home the past week. John and I will be going out for dinner tomorrow evening - a first in . . . well, a loooooooooooooong time. Maybe 9 months ago? Anyway, my point is that I'm pretty excited and nervous! Maybe I'll get a photo of our few hours out on the town in downtown Champaign!
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